By Daniella GrayShareNewsweek is a Trust Project memberA bride on Reddit has shocked the internet after sharing a baffling wedding guest dilemma involving one of her bridesmaids who attempted to RSVP not just herself and her husband—but also her sister, who wasn’t invited.
According to the 33-year-old, who goes by u/superlaserpanda on Reddit, the drama started when her bridesmaid, Stacy, explained that her husband would be out of town for the wedding and asked if she could bring her sister instead.
In a post on the r/weddingshaming subreddit, the original poster (OP) said that because the couple had allotted two adult spots for Stacy and her spouse, the bride agreed and updated their online RSVP system with the sister’s name.
...But when the RSVPs came in, all three—Stacy, her husband and her sister—had confirmed their attendance.
The bride reached out, assuming it was a mistake. Instead, Stacy responded with upbeat enthusiasm: her husband could now attend, she said, “so all three of us will be there yay.”
The bride and groom, hoping to avoid conflict during an already stressful planning process, reluctantly let the unexpected extra guest slide. With several invitees having already declined by then, they figured the space would work out.
But the situation grew stranger. About six weeks before the wedding, Stacy told the bride she might not attend after all due to the unpredictability of her pregnancy. She responded supportively, emphasizing that she just needed a final headcount soon.
Stacy then declared she likely wouldn’t come—but her sister still would. “She will represent us,” she told the bride.
At that point, the bride drew a clear boundary. “I had to tell her straight up that her sister was never on the original guest list,” she wrote. “I don’t know her that well, and she won't know anyone, and I don’t feel comfortable having her there by herself. So I told Stacy I’m going to put all three of them as a no.”
The last contact she and Stacy had was the day before her wedding. She wished her well and hoped the day went beautifully.
When asked how she felt about Stacy’s reaction, the OP, who wished to remain anonymous, told Newsweek that she had mixed feelings.
“On one hand, my life is very peaceful without her,” she said. “On the other, we have known each other for a very long time—since high school—and she is one of my longest standing friends.”
“This year has been really tough and I don't know if I'm feeling extra vulnerable and needing the extra support,” the OP continued. “She has shown support and kindness and was there with me visiting my terminally ill family member earlier in the year, but then for her to be so callous and completely unaware of how her actions make others feel, is what bothers me the most. I think the final straw was when I told her how her treating me poorly made me feel bad and she said her actions were warranted. So to me, that's not a good friend and I think it's best if we go our separate ways.”
At the time of writing, the post has received 4,700 upvotes and over 200 comments. Many Reddit users sided with the OP, with one calling Stacy “out of her mind.”
“Stacy clearly doesn’t understand how to consider her actions here. It takes a level of courtesy that people don’t generally just have,” one user wrote.
“Weird! Why would her sister still go?? That makes no sense. She's not close to the couple. And why would she want to go to a wedding she has no connection to anymore? Free meal? Lol,” another added.
The OP was surprised by the reaction on Reddit. Originally sharing what had happened to rant, she said people have been mostly supportive and reassuring.
“Overall, it has been really interesting reading the comments and other people's stories and a positive experience,” she said. “I really wasn't expecting this much engagement and it has been a nice distraction from my everyday life.”
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