Can I survive seven days of karaoke? (Picture: Sophie Clark/Metro)
It’s 10:00 am on a Friday and I’m sitting in a booth with a needle in my arm.
I’ve been putting off my flu jab for a while, but there’s no way I’m getting sick as I set off on my personal Odyssey: my one-woman quest to do karaoke for seven days straight across London.
Many people have asked me “Why?” and “Are you ok?”
Let me explain. As a life-long Londoner, I am sick of the slander that Londoners are cold, rude, and not very fun. And, while it is true that 1,165 nighttime venues in the capital have closed between 2020 and 2023, per BBC reporting, I also don’t think London nightlife should be diagnosed as terminal.
I truly believe that this city’s residents are charming, fun-loving, inviting and warm, given the right singing-based environment. And, that if you can still do karaoke until the early hours of the morning for seven days in a row, then nightlife can’t possibly be dead.
I had an iron-clad plan for the week:
- Only go to places that are free to enter and easily accessible
- Sing one ‘control’ song – in my case Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You – every night
- Sing one different song that fits the vibe of the room each night
- Try not to blow out my voice on day one
What I learned very quickly is that karaoke cannot be planned.
Writer Sophie at Belushi’s, London Bridge (Picture: Supplied)
Take my first night, for example. I decide to kick off my karaoke-athon at The Prince Albert in Peckham, only to arrive to a text from my friend saying: ‘Apparently someone is having a heart attack inside.’
She tells me an ambulance just pulled up and the karaoke machine is not on. Two equally terrible situations.
Fortunately, the paramedics say the patient will be ok, so the music soon starts. But, unlike football, there is no extra-time and my friends and I don’t get to sing before last orders.
Despite the episode of Grey’s Anatomy happening in the background, I did get my first sense of karaoke being a real community binder.
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Karen, the pub manager, who refers to the night as Kareon-oke sings Leaving on a Jet Plane as the last tune to a regular who is moving out of London. A genuinely touching and beautiful moment. Another regular, Alex, invites my friends and I to come back next week.
My second day fairs a lot better when it comes to actually getting to sing.
Objectively the best karaoke song of all time (Picture: Supplied)
I head to Apo Restobar, a Filipino restaurant in Clapham, which is fully equipped with a stage, microphones, a lightshow, a smoke machine, and a song bible (where many of the songs are in Tagalog).
The restaurant’s managing director, Aileen, tells me ‘karaoke is a part of Filipino culture’.
‘If there is a gathering, there is always karaoke. We wanted to feel like we’re home because we don’t have any family here, so that’s what we wanted to give to our fellow countrymen.’
Apo quickly fills up, and my friends and I realise we are the only non-Filipinos there. It really is the community hub that Aileen dreamed of building.
I sing Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You for the first time this week, and it gets the best compliment: people’s undivided attention.
My friend Miles and I then sing ABBA’s SOS, and find ourselves on a stranger’s Instagram Live. I like to think I’m a Z-list celebrity in the Philippines now.
We stay until a comedy group comes on, and their jokes are largely 1) about the Philippines, and 2) in Tagalog.
Day three is at my personal favourite karaoke spot in London: Biddle Bros in Clapton run by Nicky the Strict. No, not a Dickensian villain, Nicky the Strict is this East End boozer’s iconic MC who takes karaoke very seriously.
‘Karaoke’s become a bit of a thing [at Biddle Bros] because I do it a bit differently,’ she tells me.
Another rendition of Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You (Picture: Supplied)
The Biddle Bros rules (Picture: Supplied)
That’s an understatement. During the evening she tells at least two people to ‘sing into the f***cking mic!’ to their abject horror.
What I love most about Biddle Bros, other than the campy terror, is the wide range of revellers. On the night I go, 79-year-old Rick, a regular, is there with his signature harmonica and pork pie hat, as is Lily who is celebrating her 25th birthday. Two wildly different people, united by their love of singing and being ‘unserious’, as Lily put it.
In fact, “unserious” is the word I hear the most throughout my karaoke-athon.
I hear it again on Monday at Belushi’s, chatting with three university students from the US who are travelling across Europe and using karaoke as a way of bonding, meeting locals, and blowing off travel stress.
I hear it on Tuesday at Trisha’s in Soho, from Evelyn in the jam-packed smoking section.
It was a packed room at The George Tavern (Picture: Supplied)
She tells me: ‘I think [Trisha’s] is the most unpretentious karaoke which I say in the best way possible. Everyone here can sing, and everyone here can sing badly, and that’s what karaoke is all about,’ before going off to absolutely belt a rendition of All The Jazz to rapturous applause in the smoky carpeted basement, where a Tuesday evening could be a Saturday night.
I hear it on Wednesday, when I decide to take a deviation from karaoke, and instead go to the musical theatre sing-a-long bar The Room Where It Happens.
Customer Katie tells me by the piano over a chorus singing The Time Warp, ‘It’s so unserious, just have a bit of fun. A lot of nights are very ‘club-vibes’ but here you can just be yourself.’
Manager Anna also tells me: ‘Because everyone’s doing it, you don’t feel silly. I just think it’s really lovely.’
My list of London karaoke spots
The George Tavern → Hectic energy, electric vibe, very late night for a Thursday so be warned
The Prince Albert, Peckham → Great for a community feel, very friendly locals, might witness a medical incident
Apo Restobar, Clapham → Incredible soundsystem, light show, occasional smoke machine, delicious pina coladas
Biddle Bros, Clapton → Perfect for shaking off the Sunday Scaries, always a lot of colourful characters
Belushi’s, London Bridge → £5 cocktails
Trisha’s, Soho → Feels like a Friday night on a Tuesday, very enthusiastic singers, artistic and quirky crowd
The Room Where it Happens → Very inclusive, warm, and kind energy, staff and customers go out of their way to make you feel at home
Even though everyone else isn’t taking karaoke seriously, I’m still technically doing this for work, and by Thursday I regret to say I am a husk of my formal self.
I feel like the human embodiment of karaoke – a song that’s been stripped of all meaning, just a backing track loosely holding my bones together.
Tiring, but ultimately ‘not serious’ (Picture: Supplied)
I leave my house for my last night with three Strepsils in my mouth clutching my Airpods in my left hand, only to realise halfway down the street that I’m actually holding a ball of socks.
But, like a gentrified Scrooge, I’m reminded of the true meaning of karaoke at Shadwell indie haunt, The George Tavern, by Ollie who tells me, after I sang my final extremely hoarse rendition of Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You to a frankly plastered yet electric room at about 1:30 in the morning: ‘It’s just good fun. It’s not serious.’
As I leave the heaving room, still singing La Bamba at 2:00 in the morning, I realise that this story did not end up how I thought it would.
I thought I was setting off to write a ridiculous story about a goofy nighttime activity, but I ended up learning that all across London, from Peckham to Clapton, people are earnestly looking for an ‘unserious’ time.
So many of us live with enormous burdens, be it making rent, getting through our jobs, or having constant access to global horrors live-streamed into brains from our phones.
Even a lot of nightlife, which is supposed to be a release from all that, has become a self-regulating, checklist of needs: bottle service, designer outfits, being ‘on the list.’
Karaoke is the antithesis of that. It allows us all to be our goofiest, least glamorous selves without any inhibition. What an absolute rarity, and therefore an absolute treat.
What Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You taught me about each spot
Prince Albert, Peckham → N/a didn’t get to sing because of the ambulance.
Apo Restobar, Clapham → Quiet appreciation from an audience that came to see performers.
Biddle Bros, Clapton → On-your-feet dancing from a raucous crowd who were both enthused about the music and terrified of being yelled at if they were not sufficiently enthused.
Belushi’s, London Bridge → Mixed levels of singing along from a crowd who were largely from overseas and not super familiar with the tune.
Trisha’s, Soho → Absolutely raucous reception from a crowd unafraid to party hard on a Tuesday. Definitely the most…uh…charged response from certain couples who took the opportunity of a tiny room to get even closer to each other.
The Room Where it Happens → N/a this is a musical theatre bar where the pianist wields control of the songs.
The George Tavern → Less karaoke, more party that happened to include a microphone. At The George, a good tune can turn even the coolest crowd into a wildly enthusiastic choir.
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